Rupert,
Many thanks for being with us here in this forum. I have enjoyed and been deeply inspired by The Transparency of Things, especially the clarity and directness of this realisation.
I wanted to ask about an experience of many who are newly awakened where there is a falling away of a need for social contact. For me this does not arise out of any sense of aversion to people in general, because more deeply they are seen as my own self, as consciousness, spirit manifest in all things, even in the most delusional thoughts and actions. We are all ‘sinners’, so to speak (as in the Greek for sin, hamartia – missing the mark).
Still, much of the old initiative to enter into the usual ways of socialising has dropped away, and any thought of doing so seems like so much effort. I am happy to see people, and in my work it seems natural and easy, but if there isn’t a need to do so, I tend not to do it. Consequently, this is seen as antisocial and unfriendly, but it’s hard to convey that that is not the case. Do you have any thoughts about this?
Ed
Dear Ed,
Prior to this understanding, most of our thoughts, feelings and activities revolve around the imaginary entity that we believe ourself to be. This includes our interaction with others in a wide variety of ways, from normal social interaction to intimate relationships.
When an interest in the true nature of our experience takes a deep hold of our mind and heart, it is quite natural that some (or all) lesser interests get dropped to allow time and energy to devote to what has now become our deepest and most abiding interest and love.
It is natural at this stage that some interaction with others, particularly those that were based on validating and substantiating the belief of ourself as a separate entity, will naturally drop away, not, as you say, through rejection or judgement, but rather through lack of interest.
It may be equally natural in some cases, as we become more established in this understanding and taste its fruit in terms of peace, happiness and love, that a desire to share this will arise. This is not a desire that comes from a senses of separation but rather one that comes from the deep sense that what we truly are is in fact already shared. It is just a desire to express or celebrate this.
In other words such a desire comes not from a sense of lack, from a need to find happiness or love, but rather from happiness and love itself, from a natural impulse to share what we now know ourself to be.
How this takes place is unique in every case and will vary greatly from one to another. Find your own way and be confident that even if it appears otherwise, your behaviour comes from love and intelligence, not from judgement and rejection. Not everyone will see this to begin with, but in time our true colours are usually revealed.
I should also add that in some cases, and maybe this is the case for you, there may be a desire to lead a simple, quiet life without much social interaction, and if that is so, you should do that. Peace and happiness are the tests. There is no need, for instance, even to speak about this to anyone if you don’t feel like it. Your understanding will be conveyed unmistakably and without words to those around you, and may or may not elicit a response or a question.
With love,
Rupert
