Finding Courage in the Dark Night of the Soul from the media Let Go of Experience and Discover Freedom

Experience unfolds effortlessly; nobody makes experience happen. Understand and feel yourself to be the aware openness in which experience is unfolding. Let go of thoughts, feelings and sensations. We don’t have to change or get rid of anything. When we let go of the content of experience, it lets go of us, and we find ourselves effortlessly in our innate freedom. We exchange our freedom for the content of experience; we let go of the content of experience and reclaim our freedom. Thoughts and feelings have no power over us. It is we who give them their apparent power. Leave them alone, and they leave us alone. The aware openness we essentially are doesn’t need to practise letting go; it doesn’t attach itself in the first place. Have the courage, the clarity and the love to remain open. Don’t lose your self in experience; allow experience to lose itself in you.

A man asks about doership. Rupert suggests that it is not enough to know that we are not the doer of our actions. That understanding doesn’t liberate us. We may still be the thinker, feeler or perceiver. It is a partial liberation. Don’t worry about what we are not. We are interested in what we are. Imagine removing everything from ourself that can be removed – thoughts, images, feelings, sensations, perceptions, activities and relationships. To begin with, this is something we do verbally or mentally but in time this gives way to a subtler understanding that meditation or prayer is what we are. It is not what we do. We don’t need to practice being our self.

How to deal with challenges after realisation? A man describes living as this openness effortlessly for a time but feels he has returned to square one after becoming a father, whose child lives with his ex-partner near Ukraine. Rupert responds that we do whatever needs to be done to offer support but, through the tumultuous emotions, we go back to ourself over and over. Action from that place, the source of true support, is the best way to help those around us and the world.

A man says that experience confirms that his essence is loving awareness, but there are still disturbances – he has friends and family in the Ukraine. He asks, ‘How do you process war?’ Rupert suggests that conflicts are almost always based on the belief that we are separate from the other. If we want to make a real contribution to humanity, the most important thing is to be free from that belief ourselves – free from the belief that others are ‘others’. Externally, we then express that understanding in whatever way feels appropriate to us.  

A woman from Kyiv, Ukraine asks how to stay courageous in the face of death. Rupert responds that we must stay present and remain in touch with our being in the face of war and other challenges we face. Awareness is deathless and is the source of real courage.

A woman says that she is unable to rest in self due to fear. Rupert suggests that we needn’t feel that we must penetrate, change or go through fear. We just feel that we are the openness in which the fear arises. We can’t have a movie without a screen or a cloud without a sky. Rupert guides her to explore that in which her fear arises. Go deeply into the stillness of being. In time, its qualities will infuse our experience and dissipate the fear.

What is the best way to speak of and relate to death from the non-dual perspective? Rupert replies that the being that we always are, is now and beyond death. It is the same for all of us. This recognition is what we call love. Ultimately, we never lose anyone in death.

A man asks Rupert to clarify his stance on psychotherapy and the non-dual understanding. Rupert says he cannot give a definitive answer that will satisfy all cases. Different answers in response to different people may appear contradictory but are each ‘ true’ due to the relative starting point of each questioner.

A man talks about how the physical body, which he describes as a speck of dirt, seems to cloud the seeing of his true nature. Rupert suggests that it is not the physical body that is a speck of dirt; it is the belief that the physical body is a speck of dirt that is problematic. The belief that our body is something other than this one reality makes it seem that our body is something other than this one reality. If our body is not an expression of the one reality, what exactly is it? What other reality is there for our body to be an expression of? The body is not a problem.

A woman asks about the flight or fight response, which she experiences when speaking during live webinars. Rupert suggests recognising the fearlessness in which this fear response arises; recognise your true nature as this fearless space and presence of awareness.

A man asks about Rupert’s opinion on how we might establish and sustain social structures and institutions that are in accordance with the recognition of this understanding. Rupert suggests that when we act and interact in our company, business, school, organisation or community, we do our best to do so in a way that is consistent with this understanding: that is, that we share our being with everyone we interact with.

A man asks if fear and desire are the same. Rupert responds that fear and desire are different sides of the same coin: resisting and seeking, which lies at the core of the separate self. Fear is a natural response to a body in pain or in danger but is a form of resistance in psychological suffering.

A woman says that she is sometimes aware of being and then loses it, especially around family. Rupert suggests that what's happening is that sometimes you are in touch with your being and sometimes your experiences obscure your being, and you lose yourself in the content of your experience. Just continue to interact with your family and let your interactions be informed by the peace that is the nature of your being.

A young man says that his spiritual journey seems to be interrupting his career and work life. He asks if it is best to first establish oneself in one's career or discover one's true nature. Rupert says the discovery of one's true nature does not interfere with any aspect of our life and recounts his youth exploring these matters while he was going to school, and so on. He suggests following both passionately.

A man asks about his desire to be an actor and how it relates to non-duality if, for instance, a character he plays is out of alignment with the understanding. Rupert suggests that it's not always necessary to act roles that are benign and peaceful but to try to play the character with a presence that communicates itself beyond the qualities of the character that he's playing. It's the way you play the character, not the character you play. You can play the bad guy.

Experience unfolds effortlessly; nobody makes experience happen. Understand and feel yourself to be the aware openness in which experience is unfolding. Let go of thoughts, feelings and sensations. We don’t have to change or get rid of anything. When we let go of the content of experience, it lets go of us, and we find ourselves effortlessly in our innate freedom. We exchange our freedom for the content of experience; we let go of the content of experience and reclaim our freedom. Thoughts and feelings have no power over us. It is we who give them their apparent power. Leave them alone, and they leave us alone. The aware openness we essentially are doesn’t need to practise letting go; it doesn’t attach itself in the first place. Have the courage, the clarity and the love to remain open. Don’t lose your self in experience; allow experience to lose itself in you.

A man asks about doership. Rupert suggests that it is not enough to know that we are not the doer of our actions. That understanding doesn’t liberate us. We may still be the thinker, feeler or perceiver. It is a partial liberation. Don’t worry about what we are not. We are interested in what we are. Imagine removing everything from ourself that can be removed – thoughts, images, feelings, sensations, perceptions, activities and relationships. To begin with, this is something we do verbally or mentally but in time this gives way to a subtler understanding that meditation or prayer is what we are. It is not what we do. We don’t need to practice being our self.

How to deal with challenges after realisation? A man describes living as this openness effortlessly for a time but feels he has returned to square one after becoming a father, whose child lives with his ex-partner near Ukraine. Rupert responds that we do whatever needs to be done to offer support but, through the tumultuous emotions, we go back to ourself over and over. Action from that place, the source of true support, is the best way to help those around us and the world.

A man says that experience confirms that his essence is loving awareness, but there are still disturbances – he has friends and family in the Ukraine. He asks, ‘How do you process war?’ Rupert suggests that conflicts are almost always based on the belief that we are separate from the other. If we want to make a real contribution to humanity, the most important thing is to be free from that belief ourselves – free from the belief that others are ‘others’. Externally, we then express that understanding in whatever way feels appropriate to us.  

A woman from Kyiv, Ukraine asks how to stay courageous in the face of death. Rupert responds that we must stay present and remain in touch with our being in the face of war and other challenges we face. Awareness is deathless and is the source of real courage.

A woman says that she is unable to rest in self due to fear. Rupert suggests that we needn’t feel that we must penetrate, change or go through fear. We just feel that we are the openness in which the fear arises. We can’t have a movie without a screen or a cloud without a sky. Rupert guides her to explore that in which her fear arises. Go deeply into the stillness of being. In time, its qualities will infuse our experience and dissipate the fear.

What is the best way to speak of and relate to death from the non-dual perspective? Rupert replies that the being that we always are, is now and beyond death. It is the same for all of us. This recognition is what we call love. Ultimately, we never lose anyone in death.

A man asks Rupert to clarify his stance on psychotherapy and the non-dual understanding. Rupert says he cannot give a definitive answer that will satisfy all cases. Different answers in response to different people may appear contradictory but are each ‘ true’ due to the relative starting point of each questioner.

A man talks about how the physical body, which he describes as a speck of dirt, seems to cloud the seeing of his true nature. Rupert suggests that it is not the physical body that is a speck of dirt; it is the belief that the physical body is a speck of dirt that is problematic. The belief that our body is something other than this one reality makes it seem that our body is something other than this one reality. If our body is not an expression of the one reality, what exactly is it? What other reality is there for our body to be an expression of? The body is not a problem.

A woman asks about the flight or fight response, which she experiences when speaking during live webinars. Rupert suggests recognising the fearlessness in which this fear response arises; recognise your true nature as this fearless space and presence of awareness.

A man asks about Rupert’s opinion on how we might establish and sustain social structures and institutions that are in accordance with the recognition of this understanding. Rupert suggests that when we act and interact in our company, business, school, organisation or community, we do our best to do so in a way that is consistent with this understanding: that is, that we share our being with everyone we interact with.

A man asks if fear and desire are the same. Rupert responds that fear and desire are different sides of the same coin: resisting and seeking, which lies at the core of the separate self. Fear is a natural response to a body in pain or in danger but is a form of resistance in psychological suffering.

A woman says that she is sometimes aware of being and then loses it, especially around family. Rupert suggests that what's happening is that sometimes you are in touch with your being and sometimes your experiences obscure your being, and you lose yourself in the content of your experience. Just continue to interact with your family and let your interactions be informed by the peace that is the nature of your being.

A young man says that his spiritual journey seems to be interrupting his career and work life. He asks if it is best to first establish oneself in one's career or discover one's true nature. Rupert says the discovery of one's true nature does not interfere with any aspect of our life and recounts his youth exploring these matters while he was going to school, and so on. He suggests following both passionately.

A man asks about his desire to be an actor and how it relates to non-duality if, for instance, a character he plays is out of alignment with the understanding. Rupert suggests that it's not always necessary to act roles that are benign and peaceful but to try to play the character with a presence that communicates itself beyond the qualities of the character that he's playing. It's the way you play the character, not the character you play. You can play the bad guy.